Rylan Schaeffer

Kernel Papers

31 July 2021

Bri's Wedding

by Rylan Schaeffer

My older sister Bri had her wedding today, and I had the pleasure of attending as well as the privilege of officiating. The state of Washington authorizes government officials and religious figures to officiate weddings, and it turns out that becoming an ordained minister in 2021 takes an email address and 5 minutes:

My bathroom selfie with Dad half-visible really communicates the gravitas of my ordination:

My favorite part of that ordination letter is that it says “Rylan Schaeffer has been granted the full authority to perform marriage rites and other religious services”. I suppose if any babies need a baptism or a circumcision, I could give it a try, but you may not like your results.

We flew into Seattle two days before the wedding.

Two nights before the wedding, we had dinner on Bri’s rooftop with gorgeous weather and a clear view of downtown Seattle:

The night before the wedding, we rehearsed the wedding:

and then ate dinner with her fiance’s family:

On the day of the wedding, I took behind-the-scenes photos pictures of the venue while others were getting ready.

Bri had her makeup done:

I asked Mom to pose for a picture, but she instead felt the need to fix my tie

Mom and Dad did pose for a totem picture, in honor of the Pacific Northwest

Dad was thrilled to know that DJs still have “turntables”

I don’t currently have many photos of the ceremony (professional photographs haven’t yet arrived), but I do have one shot

The cake was gorgeous, topped by a “recursive” LEGO set

Dad peeked in on the stage wedding certificate signing:

At the reception, Bri had a good time with Mom:

and also had a good time with Dad:

and our family friends and extended family were having a great time too

Bri and Dad killed their father-daughter dance.

And I also co-MC’ed a game called Two Shoes, in which the bride and groom are asked comparative questions about each other (e.g. who’s more likely to burn dinner) and have to answer without seeing the other’s answer.

tags: family